Like Then, Only Now, And Slightly Different....

A year ago yesterday Tess found me drunk on a bench on campus after I'd taken to drinking again for the first time in six months. And thus our friendship began. History repeats itself.

I think it's funny, in a sad kind of way, because this time this year is so much like last year. Even down to the people around me -- last year it was Kirby and Witham randomly out one night as I was going through everything back then; last night, guess who I randomly run into (they both don't go here and I see them like once every semester or so).

Everything has played out so similar. Not just these last few days, but the whole scheme of things. It pisses me off and it makes me sad. I'm generally just hurt because of what I'm going through and the past few days added to this does not make it any better. I feel like I can't accomplish anything. I don't know why people keep doing this to me or what I've done to deserve this after working so hard to sort my things out. Gotta love how things fall apart when you need them to stay together the most.

Fuck yeah.

I'm tired of fighting for people, never giving up on them, and getting only hurt in return. I'm tired of people blaming me for things that aren't my fault; seriously, I feel guilty enough for things that I absolutely should not, so why contribute more to that?!

I've been pretty down because of everything I'm going through right now. I'm pretty sure that it's just gonna get worse for a little while.

That's about all I've got to say. I just wish for once someone would care for me the way I care for them.